Elevator pitch

Looking for some honest feedback. How does this sound for an elevator pitch? My LLC name is Helpful Home Solutions LLC. The slogan is -Providing Property Owners with Creative Solutions through their Real Estate Challenges. The elevator pitch/ audio business card is - Our mission is to empower property owners with creative ways to move through their real estate challenges. Allowing them to regain control from the bank, potentially saving thousands in real estate fees and protecting their credit so they can move forward.